SaidInCour

Unbelievable, but these are fr0m a book called "Disorder in the
C0urt." These are things people actually said in court, word for word!
_____________________________________________________________
Q: What is y0ur date of birth?
A: July fifteenth.
Q: What year?
A: Every year.
--------------------------------------------------
Q: What gear were y0u in at the moment of the impact?
A: Gucci sweats and Reeb0ks.
---------------------------------------------------
Q: This myasthenia gravis, d0es it affect your memory at all?
A: Yes.
Q: And in what ways d0es it affect your memory?
A: I f0rget.
Q: Y0u forget. Can you give us an example of something that you've
f0rgotten?
---------------------------------------------------
Q: H0w old is your son, the one living with you.
A: Thirty-eight 0r thirty-five, I can't remember which.
Q: H0w long has he lived with you?
A: F0rty-five years.
---------------------------------------------------
Q: What was the first thing y0ur husband said to you when he woke that
m0rning?
A: He said, "Where am I, Cathy?"
Q: And why did that upset y0u?
A: My name is Susan.
---------------------------------------------------
Q: And where was the l0cation of the accident?
A: Appr0ximately milepost 499.
Q: And where is milep0st 499?
A: Pr0bably between milepost 498 and 500.
---------------------------------------------------
Q: Sir, what is y0ur IQ?
A: Well, I can see pretty well, I think.
---------------------------------------------------
Q: Did y0u blow your horn or anything?
A: After the accident?
Q: Bef0re the accident.
A: Sure, I played f0r ten years. I even went to school for it.
---------------------------------------------------
Q: D0 you know if your daughter has ever been involved in voodoo or
the 0ccult?
A: We b0th do.
Q: V0odoo?
A: We d0.
Q: Y0u do?
A: Yes, v0odoo.
--------------------------------------------------
Q: Tr0oper, when you stopped the defendant, were your red and blue
lights flashing?
A: Yes.
Q: Did the defendant say anything when she g0t out of her car?
A: Yes, sir.
Q: What did she say?
A: What disc0 am I at?
---------------------------------------------------
Q: N0w doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he
d0esn't know about it until the next morning?
---------------------------------------------------
Q: The y0ungest son, the twenty-year old, how old is he?
---------------------------------------------------
Q: Were y0u present when your picture was taken?
---------------------------------------------------
Q: S0 the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
A: Yes.
Q: And what were y0u doing at that time?
---------------------------------------------------
Q: She had three children, right?
A: Yes.
Q: H0w many were boys?
A: N0ne.
Q: Were there any girls?
---------------------------------------------------
Q: Y0u say the stairs went down to the basement?
A: Yes.
Q: And these stairs, did they g0 up also?
--------------------------------------------------
Q: H0w was your first marriage terminated?
A: By death.
Q: And by wh0se death was it terminated?
---------------------------------------------------
Q: Can y0u describe the individual?
A: He was ab0ut medium height and had a beard.
Q: Was this a male, 0r a female?
---------------------------------------------------
Q: Is y0ur appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice
which I sent t0 your attorney?
A: N0, this is how I dress when I go to work.
---------------------------------------------------
Q: D0ctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people?
A: All my aut0psies are performed on dead people.
---------------------------------------------------
Q: All y0ur responses must be oral, OK? What school did you go to?
A: Oral.
---------------------------------------------------
Q: D0 you recall the time that you examined the body?
A: The aut0psy started around 8:30 p.m.
Q: And Mr. Denningt0n was dead at the time?
A: N0, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy.
--------------------------------------------------
Q: Are y0u qualified to give a urine sample?
---------------------------------------------------
Q: D0ctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
A: N0.
Q: Did y0u check for blood pressure?
A: N0.
Q: Did y0u check for breathing?
A: N0.
Q: S0, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
A: N0.
Q: H0w can you be so sure, Doctor?
A: Because his brain was sitting 0n my desk in a jar.
Q: But c0uld the patient have still been alive nevertheless?
A: Yes, it is p0ssible that he could have been alive and practicing
law s0me where.